lifestyle blogger, Motivation

To Impact or Impress?

Upon first starting my blog two years ago I automatically felt the need to create this glorified online personality. Being the typical internet crazed millennial that I am, I basically grew up on the internet via YouTube and random blogs that I would frequent. So it only makes sense that I too would eventually venture off into the world of blogging. Nevertheless, I assumed that in order to keep the fire burning beneath my creativity I would have to amass this great following of people. But, as of late it has come to my attention that none of that matters.

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As a kid I used to pray to God that one day my writing and creativity would help save the world in some way. Obviously you can’t actually save the world from itself but you can help heal different parts of it. Anyways, I remember back in March when I began to take my blog more serious thinking to myself “Damn, who even cares what I’ve got to say?” You see, my mind was so caught up in who I could impress rather than who I could impact. That right there is one of the worst mentalities a creative or influencer of any sort can have.

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God did not bless me with the skill of writing or creativity to amass a great following of people online. God blessed me with this talent in order for me to fulfill my purpose through God’s plan. My mindset when first starting this blog was immature if anything and extremely vain.

Today, I have a small following of 60 people on this blog and honestly that to me is suffice. What more do I need if I am already impacting people? Recognition, accolades and praise on my content does nothing to fulfill God’s plan on my life. All that matters now is that I know I am putting my work out there and whoever gravitates towards my content is who will hopefully be impacted.

Overall, I want to encourage my fellow creatives to let go of the need to have a great amount of attention when it comes to your work. Of course, many of us would appreciate that following so that we can reach more people and hopefully make a profit from doing what we love. However, once financial or social capital becomes your main focus that is when you lose the true essence of who you are and the true meaning of your work.

I want to encourage you all not to lose the essence of yourself or your creative genius. Social support is nice and can be helpful financially but at the end of the day don’t sell yourself short just for attention. Aside from this blog, I began feeling the need to over emphasize my talents by being a little extra on my social media platforms. This is in part why I have taken a break from the main sites that influence me to behave as such.

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Nonetheless, throughout this social media hiatus I have reflected this very factor, I need to allow my writing to speak for itself. I don’t need to impress the world, I only need to impact it and positively to be exact.

 

 

 

Serenity, Smiles and Positive Vibes,

 

 

 

 

Ms. Royale

 

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Inspirational Quotes, lifestyle blogger, Motivation

Live Your Best Life RIGHT Now!

Throughout this past year I’ve been on a self discovery like no other. I’ve learned to appreciate and see value in parts of my life I had once never seen. I’ve learned the true power of positive thinking and activated the law of attraction into my life. There’s so much more I could dish out to you about my improved mindset but I want this to be about you, splendid reader.

If you can allow yourself to get caught up in some of the atrocities of this world it will hinder you from a lot which is why learning how to focus more on the positivity that exists is so important. Of course there are times when we need to address issues for what they are but don’t forget to embrace the blessings, big and small.

Just last month I visited Mexico and as mentioned in my last Focus Friday Post I lost my wallet. Unfortunately I went crazy for about two days straight thinking it was left at the airport there but the following Sunday night I received an email from the airline that it was actually found at the airport back here in the states.

You see, when I focused all of my energy on the issue in that moment it wasn’t at all helpful. I did what it is that I needed to do which was follow proper protocols such as filing a report and such. However, even after doing all that I still felt the need to panic as if that would make it all better. Well, it didn’t but you knew that splendid reader because you are super smart (hence how you stumbled upon this blog and this post).

I want to keep this short and sweet for you so I need you to pay close attention here. Our energy in life is extremely sacred and it is up to each individual to be safe keepers of their own energy. When we allow ourselves to exert so much energy and devote copious amounts of time in the direction of what we don’t want, then we are preventing good things from coming our way. For some folks this idea is called “blocking your blessings,” or for others they say “you are getting in your own way.”

“Our energy in life is extremely sacred and it is up to each individual to be safe keepers of their own energy.”

With all that said, I realized that in the moment that my wallet went missing I immediately blocked the blessing of its return to me. I panicked, freaked out cried, and kept calling the airport back in Mexico. I even made a whole list of numbers to call from both airports. I googled the different department numbers and such. Granted, yes it made sense to reach out and make reports. However, when I look back on the way that I went about it, I became obsessive.

By the time Sunday evening came around a few days after I lost my wallet, I had already settled into the idea that finding it was no longer a concern. I came to terms with the fact that after all the wallet and its contents are replaceable. So in my mind I remained hopeful but also realized excessively ruminating on the matter wouldn’t do me any good. Thus, I allowed the universe to bring me whatever it was that I had manifested through previous good deeds and actions towards others. There have been several times throughout college where I found lost student ID’s and I immediately found a way to reach out to these individuals. Then during Mardi Gras this year back in New Orleans a man had dropped his license and I automatically picked up trying to find a way to get it back to him. Thankfully he had already started to walk back towards the area he had lost it. Of course on all of these occasions I was thanked abundantly.

“So in my mind I remained hopeful but also realized excessively ruminating on the matter wouldn’t do me any good.”

While this may sound bizarre to some, I truly do believe the universe and God blessed me enough to find my wallet. Rather than sitting around solely concerned with how life could get better for me, I allowed it to simply get better as a result of what I had already worked for. You see, living your best life isn’t about working yourself to the bone in an effort to make it. Don’t get me wrong, there is work to be done but you need to know when it is time to sit back and receive what life has in store for you.

So now, splendid reader tell me again what is holding you back from living your best or most splendid life? Are you blocking your blessings by thinking too much about how to get those blessings in the first place? Are you focused on the wrong things or consumed in negativity?

“You see, living your best life isn’t about working yourself to the bone in an effort to make it.”

If you are consumed in negativity, it is important for you to think of ways to remove yourself from that space. One of the ways I did so was by taking a social media hiatus from specific sites that usually put me in a troubled mindset. One of the ways I’ve allowed blessings to flow straight to me is by doing the work and moving on. Once you’ve done what you need to do for a situation it is okay to move on (i.e. my wallet story). In essence, as cliche as it is, I have been the sole blessing blocker of myself by focusing my energy in places that it didn’t need to be.

Nevertheless, in order for you to live your best life you’ve got to put yourself into that mindset first. Being consumed in negativity, being caught up with people who hold you back or in circumstances that stunt your growth is not the way to live your best life.

Today’s Takeaway

  1. Our energy is too sacred to continuously focus on what is troubling us, so focus your energy more on what you want versus what you don’t want.

  2. Do the work and move forward which will allow the blessings to flow your way.

  3. Remove yourself from negative situations as much as possible (i.e. people, jobs, social media etc.).

  4. Be prepared for blessings 

Serenity, Smiles, & Positive Vibes,

Ms. Royale

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Creative Writing, Featured, feminism, feminist, History, Monday, Motivation, Quotes

More to Life Mondays #1

Today, I am kicking off More to Life Mondays which is a part of my Weekly Wisdom Series. If you didn’t get a chance to see what More to Life Mondays are all about, click here for more info.

I am proud to start this part of the series off by sharing with you all this quote by one of my favorite writers, Alice Walker.

I truly love the stance that this quote abides by because we as humans have so much power. However, if we allow ourselves to continuously wallow in self doubt or pity it is easy to give that power away to others. But, I want you to take these 3 tips and apply them to your life.

1)Stand in your STRENGTH.

Now this might sound strange but strength and power are not the same thing. In fact, strength is defined as the amount of force a muscle or group of muscles, can exert against an external load. Strength is also known as a quality of a person or thing.

So essentially our strength lies in how much we can take based off the physical or mental muscles that we each have as individuals. Having different strengths from others does not make one weak or weaker than the next. This is why we must learn, understand and accept the strengths that we all have. It is unhealthy to try and apply what someone else has to your life without first realizing your own strengths. Your homework is to create a list of your top 3 strengths.

For example, I would make my list go something like this: 1) I can make people laugh, 2) I am a pretty decent cook (nervous lol still learning) and 3) I am really good at keeping calm

2)Stand in your POWER.

Power is our ability to influence the behavior of others or the course of events that a place at a given time. Now this one gets a little tricky. As a Black woman I can easily say I am strong, no not because of the stereotypical of “Strong black woman.” Rather, I can say that because I as a woman who is also Black and other Black women, we have endured some of the harshest treatment in this country since its inception. Now can I say I am powerful? I mean based off of what American society would have you believe, I cannot be powerful because not only is my race oppressed but so is my gender.

Regardless of what society might assume, I do believe that I am and we as Black women are in fact very powerful. I also believe that power can sometimes be misconstrued as an entity reserved solely for those who are commonly in positions of “power.” This is what causes many of us to feel as if our voices cannot be heard in front of the masses, and therefore we begin to feel powerless. Then we end up giving this power away like Walker stated in her quote because we believe we don’t have any.

For Black women, and anyone out there who has ever thought this way, I want you to take some time to do some reflecting on why this is actually detrimental to our very lives. If you constantly feel as if you have no power simply because others have deemed you powerless or an entire system has you are doing yourself a disservice. It is not an easy mindset to remove by yourself and trust me I am not saying you are to blame for having this mentality. There are many reasons why people feel they are powerless and those reasons are very valid/real. But, what I want you all to understand is that there is power within all of us. If you search you will find it.

More homework: What is your power? Write that down under your list of strengths. (i.e. my power is my singing, writing, or my education)

3) Lastly, but most importantly, stand in your GREATNESS because trust me it exists within you. It is simply waiting for you to free it into the physical realm of the universe.

Just like the power that exists within us, there is also greatness. It may take the people who are in your close circle to see it first or maybe even for you to see it in someone else first. Now when I say for you to see it in someone else, that does not mean you go around comparing your current situation or life in general to others. (BIG RED FLAG) What I mean is that you may notice you also have a desire to sing, act, dance, hell go to the moon and you see someone else doing it, and now you are inspired. Regardless of how you find it, trust and believe me it lives inside of you. Your soul is always trying to give you the steps towards unleashing that greatness into the world but only you have the key to open that gate of great.

With that said, Alice Walker is definitely the perfect piece to fit into this puzzle of More to Life Mondays posts. She embodies the power and passion that it takes to push past life’s misfortunes. Often times whenever we hear the stories of successful public figures, there are certain pieces to their success puzzle that is left out. Thankfully in the case of Alice Walker this is not the case.  After doing some research I was shocked to find out what led to her love for literature. While my connection to literature also started as a child, what drove her towards it was totally different than my own experience.

Anyhow, in several interviews Walker has expressed that at the age of about 8 or 9 years old she was accidentally injured with a BB gun while playing with her brothers. The injury resulted in blindness in one eye which led to emotional issues due to the physical impact following the accident. As a coping mechanism, Alice found herself enamored with a new found love for reading and writing. She later insisted that this moment of “isolation,” was a contributing factor that led her on the path to her passion for literature. She spent a lot of time away from the world which helped her to develop a more introspective view on life and in turn helped to build her muscle in terms of writing.

While that incident took place much earlier on in her life, I would like to use that as an example to help encourage those of you reading. Since that incident, Walker’s books went on to be awarded several best sellers, the Pulitzer Prize, the National Book Award and other literary accolades. Now, imagine if little Alice had determined from that one incident that she would no longer try in life.

While that situation in itself could have caused death, it didn’t. Rather it caused immediate physical damage and later emotional damage as well. That same damage became converted into positive energy which helped her land a partial scholarship for college. Just as she stated in the video, “You can’t even be mad at your misfortunes because it led you somewhere.” Y’all I’m telling you, sometimes you biggest blessings comes out of your biggest setback. Also, a quick side note Walker also graduated as Valedictorian of her class AND was voted prom queen. I’m sure she never imagined those two factors would come to fruition when she was going through her season of insecurity as a child.

Nevertheless, it would be wrong for me not to acknowledge the fact that as humans we all deal with emotional baggage differently. So in this moment, I want you all to understand that all coping comes in different forms. Sometimes coping comes in the framework of negative behavior such as acting out, taking your anger out on others or self-harm. However, there are times when people cope in a more positive manner for a number of reasons. I won’t get too deep into that because I can dive deeper into that in a later post.

The point that I am aiming at here is that our mindset has to be set on success and the techniques that it takes to get there. If we are solely focused on the negativity going on in our personal life, or what else can go bad in the world, 9 times out of 10 something will go bad. While this may not apply to every situation due to external variables such as racism, sexism, classism and all the other isms; we do have more power than we think we do.

Energy is a very powerful tool, and we must learn to use it wisely. So tell me, are you going to remain in a negatively energetic mentality or a one full of positive energy? Regardless of what negative thought dares to pop up, you have to get a hold of those thoughts and remind them that you have the POWER. Then use that reminder to remind the world as well. Exert your strength to exhibit the power that exists within you in order to release the greatness that you also have inside of you!

Serenity, Smiles and Positive Vibes to all,

Ms. Royale

Shout out to all the sources used for this post:

  1. http://alicewalkersgarden.com/about/
  2. http://www.biography.com/people/alice-walker-9521939
  3. http://www.fembio.org/english/biography.php/woman/biography/alice-walker/
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Inspirational Quotes, Quotes

You Deserve Joy!

“In a world full of anger, pain, and hostility you must learn to be good to yourself Do yourself justice by believing and applying this simply fact: you deserve to be filled with joy!”-Ms. Royale

Just do one thing for yourself everyday: BE GOOD TO YOU. Allow positive energy to flow around and through to. If that means removing yourself from circles of gossip, negativity, & personalities that no longer flow with yours, DO THAT! Just be good to you and that’s how you can do good for others and good in the world.

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