Inspirational Quotes, lifestyle blogger, Monday, Motivation

More to Life Monday’s: Realign Your Mind

There are times when negativity seems to be the easiest thing to embrace. Parts of our lives are constantly going in what we believe is the wrong direction. In other words a lot of us may feel like “we are falling apart.”

The reality of this mindset is that we are never actually falling apart. You may be in physical, emotional or mental pain but you are still here. Therefore, something along the line has gone right.

While it may be convenient to be down or sad, it’s not worth it in the long run. A lot of us are used to vibrating on a lower energy and that’s why I say it “may be convenient.” We are not used to good things or good things happening consistently. So before we even try to embrace the good, we fall into the trap of expecting and even embracing the bad. It’s as if we say to ourselves “well this may hurt but it’s familiar.”

It’s time to realign yourself with positivity. Readjust your focus on the beauty of life and less on the ugly of it. There are splendid moments happening all around us everyday and more days of splendor are on their way. However, you’ve got to be open to these opportunities without a doubt because doubt can shut those doors closed.

Don’t allow your faith to waver or you fear to overcome it. As you begin to readjust your focus and realign your mind with a higher vibration, then you will soon realize that you were never falling apart but in fact pieces of your life were falling right into place.

Serenity, Smiles & Positive Vibes,

Ms. Royale

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How-To, Inspirational Quotes, lifestyle blogger, Monday, Motivation

Make 2018 Your Year of Splendor

It has officially been one whole week of 2018. I hope that you all are feeling rejuvenated and ready to tackle another 365. All over social media and even in day to day conversation there’s a widely shared opinion that 2017 was straight up B-A-N-A-N-A-S.  *cue Gwen Stefani please*

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Nevertheless, for those of us who struggled, stressed, and suffered immensely whether it be mentally or physically, there is still hope. I know it sounds cliche or hell it actually is very cliche but for me a new year often provides this feeling of being washed over with the purest of waters. Perhaps that is why my favorite holiday is the New Year. I know the numbers changing on a calendar doesn’t necessarily reset your life’s conditions but you can do so by making that change yourself.

Now, while I am no longer one for resolutions I do stand firm in the idea of creating reasonable goals for yourself with real action plans set behind them. I won’t knock those who start the new year hitting the gym hard or stocking up on low carb foods from their local grocery store because that was once me. However, there were years when I actually stuck to those resolutions. The major key for the years that I did stick to my goals was that not only did I envision myself in that new space, I first embodied the person I wanted to be mentally. That mindset along with a gameplan led me to my success.

A few years back in 2011 I decided I would go full throttle on a weight loss journey which resulted in my shedding of nearly 30 pounds. Now throughout college and life post grad that weight (and then some) did return , BUT that initial success came from a few things that I would like for you to apply to your own daily routine.

First things first, discover your desire.

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What is that thing you’ve been putting off FOREVER? Yeah that thing. Yup, I know you’re thinking about it. The book you’ve been wanting to write. The credit card you’ve been wishing would be paid off. Sidenote: wishful thinking cannot and will never make bills disappear, you’ve gotta do the work. Nonetheless, I want you all to take into consideration just one thing you’d like to accomplish for 2018 and work at it like it’s your day job. Hell so many of us have jobs we don’t even like but we work at it so hard we eventually lack the desire to do what we actually want to do. Let’s begin to redirect our energy to our true desires and perhaps we can began to build wealth off of that desire.

Second thing, *ahem* GET HELP. 

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I know it sounds scary for my fellow prideful folks out there who also happen to be very fearful of appearing dependent upon others. However, let’s be real here, there comes a point in life where doing it alone isn’t worth it. One of the major keys to how I lost that weight back in 2011 is that I had accountability at home and at school. My mother helped me buy foods that were healthier and even prepared the random recipes I had found online. At school I had my best friend who was also on a weight loss journey to keep me encouraged. Right after school we’d both workout in our rooms but in order to keep ourselves in check we would call each at the start of the workout. This happened consistently on a daily basis.

“Let’s begin to redirect our energy to our true desires and perhaps we can began to build wealth off of that desire.”

You see, it’s quite simple actually to find help. It’s everywhere. As a matter of fact, even if you don’t have family or friends to keep you accountable you can find an online community. There are so many groups on Facebook that I am sure you can find one that relates to whatever it is that you are working towards. Of course not everyone is on Facebook which is why there are other platforms we can utilize to find our own tribe (i.e. Pinterest, Twitter, Tumblr etc.). So please, I urge you to find yourself a reliable accountability partner.

Third thing, create a realistic action plan.

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A lot of us go on the deep end when it comes to goal setting. We create this abundant list of what we want to do but then in the end nothing gets accomplished. Then we kick ourselves while mentally imploding in a C sharp note of “Why me?” or “I can’t do anything right.”

STOP! Just stop that dry ass pity party and self loathing celebration by jumping right into real goal setting. This can be as simple as opening a word document and writing down your goal with one step that can lead you closer to actual results. (i.e. I want to eat less sugar- Have one meal a day without any sugar in it). I picked sugar as an example because most of us are in fact addicted to it. I also chose it because that’s actually a new goal of mine.

“Just stop that dry ass pity party and self loathing celebration by jumping right into real goal setting.”

Nevertheless, start with simple tasks that can eventually add up to even more complex ones that will then lead to your goal (s) being accomplished. You can find some examples of how to create your action plan sheet by clicking here.

Whatever you do, please start slow.  Also, make sure your goals are SMART (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Time-Set deadlines). Don’t rush into it or feel as if you aren’t doing well simply because you’ve just begun. I want you to keep this in mind: Success never invites the elevator to its events, but the stairs on the other hand is always its honorary guest. It takes time to flourish, and it takes to time truly elevate to the next level.

Fourth thing, be kind to yourself.

Yes there will be times when you don’t feel like sticking to your goals but you’ve got to always go back to why you started in the first place. What made you want to have that desire in the first place and why would you stop now when you are so much closer to the end than you were yesterday? Regardless, be kind to yourself and know when a break is necessary. Understand that it is okay to pace yourself. It is about finishing the race NOT rushing through it.

“Success never invites the elevator to its events, but the stairs on the other hand is always its honorary guest.”

One more thing before I go, according to numerology as well as the bible the number 8 holds great significance. Now, I’m not going to get too deep because this isn’t some sort of spiritual lesson but I do find the meaning of names/numbers to be quite intriguing. In the bible the number 8 is considered a sign of new beginnings. Others believe that the number 8 is a representation of infinity including everything good. The number 8 is also seen as a balance which represents what you’ve sown and what you will receive as a result.

Overall, 2018 can be  whatever your heart desires. This can be your year of new beginnings, infinite blessings & accomplishments. 2018 can also be your year of sowing seeds of greatness that will soon turn into goals accomplished, doors unlocked and fears defeated. At the end of the day like the rap duo Black Sheep said “The Choice Is Yours.”

 

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Serenity, Smiles & Positive Vibes,

 

 

 

Ms. Royale

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Inspirational Quotes, lifestyle blogger, Motivation

One Step At a Time

Our society today is inundated with this idea that success is just like microwaveable popcorn. I know that may sound strange upon first hearing it but really think about it. How long does it take for some instant popcorn to be made? The popcorn bag instructions usually state that it needs to be microwaved for about a minute and some change, so anywhere from 1:50-2:00 minutes. You throw your bag of popcorn in, set the cooking time, and wait for the joyful sounds of ‘pop, pop, pop’ to eventually ring in your ears and then within just a few minutes…

BOOM! Your lovely snack or college dinner is done.

Now consider this, how many us of have actually made popcorn from scratch? I sure haven’t. In fact, as I am typing this I am googling how long it takes to make homemade popcorn. In fact, how many of us have even made popcorn using a popcorn machine? *crickets*

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Popcorn Machine Goodness (Gif Source)

Exactly. Now, if you have worked in food service or residence life back in college (me) you might be familiar with how to work it or at the very least how to clean it (…me again). Either way, if you are making popcorn on the stove or via a machine it takes time. Even the process after you are done making it takes even more time. You have to wash the pan, or the different parts of the machine carefully with soap to remove residue. Let’s not forget why or how these items got dirty in the first place. Think about the oil, and salt or your seasoning of choice. All of those ingredients eventually come together to produce buildup on the pan or the machine.

Speaking of machine, prior to even using it you’ve got to heat it up for a good 3-4 minutes first and the same thing goes for the stovetop directions.  All in all in order to make popcorn it takes multiple steps for tasty results. In order for some quality popped corn you’ve got to be willing to take it slow.

Now why the in the world am I referencing all things popcorn? You clicked on this post to learn what it means to take it one step at a time, right? If not, you are on the wrong post.

Alright, alright enough with the jokes, I know they’re getting dry.

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But, on a serious note my splendid reader I know that you already understand what’s going on here because you are intelligent which is why you are here in the first place.

All day long, a good number of us get so enthralled with this idea of instant everything. Instant oatmeal, noodles, macaroni (which by the way is only good when baked & especially Caribbean style), and even instant rice (a sin in my Haitian culture to be quite honest) that we forget the essence of hard work for a tasty meal. This forgetfulness extends itself far beyond food. A prime example is this idea of success via social media. While I have no personal beef with SM, it troubles me that so many of us feel that by receiving a large number of followers, reblogs, retweets, likes etc. (the list goes on) that we are somehow validated. What really bothers me is when people use SM as a way to actually be validated when validation should first come from within.

With that said, there are other instant privileges that have caused us to lack appreciation of a process in order to progress. Remember dial-up internet before high speed took over? I sure do. My siblings and I would have to take turns on who would make a phone call or use the internet. No in betweens.

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Good Ol Dial-Up Internet

How about Blockbuster or renting VHS tapes or DVDs from the library? Again, I do. There was no instant click of a button to Netflix. Not to mention the other irritating factor of texting which took 5-10 minutes per character and that’s me being generous.

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Blockbuster You Were So Good To Us

Nevertheless, the reason I kept bringing up popcorn earlier is because when we really think about it most of us have never tasted how good stovetop popcorn probably is. Hell, I haven’t but I have tasted fresh popcorn from a popcorn machine and it is by far way tastier than the one you just pop into the microwave. So I can only imagine what stovetop popcorn would be like once met with my tastebuds. The point is, we don’t know how its natural flavor because most of us have never taken out the time it takes to make it from scratch. We are missing that authentic taste because we aren’t willing to do what it takes to achieve that authenticity. This goes hand in hand with success and reaching your dreams. You’ve got to be willing to put one foot in front of the other and take individual steps. No rushing.

“What really bothers me is when people use SM [social media] as a way to actually be validated when validation should first come from within.”

With that said, it’s time out for allowing social media or the climate of our society to dictate how fast or slow we go when it comes to succeeding. Every individual who we now consider to be a legend of some sort has done something legendary over a period of time. One of my favorite memes says, “Beyonce/Oprah wasn’t built in a day,” and we all know the original phrase goes “Rome wasn’t built in a day.” Now what does Rome, Oprah and Beyonce have to do with anything I’m saying here?

Think about it, Rome was once one of the greatest empires in the world, Beyonce is now known as one of the greatest entertainers in the world (no…that is not debatable), and Oprah…well need I say more?

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Of course the list goes on of remarkable kingdoms, people, and such but you get the point. It troubles me that the generation behind me and many in my own are so obsessed with instant fame/success. All of these instantaneous moments of clout or praise are often fleeting. You can very well have what it takes to fly high for a moment, but the real focus should be whether or not you have what it takes to remain afloat. 15 seconds doesn’t last as long as you may expect or want it to last.

If you are in the midst of climbing the ladder to of your dreams I want you to be reminded that the longer it takes to make something usually means it will also taste way better. Fruits and vegetables are not instantly sprouted up out of the ground (maybe the GMO ones are…) but for the most part it takes the planting of a seed, care, fertile soil, water, good aim of sunlight, and most importantly it takes some time to produce these foods.

“You can very well have what it takes to fly high for a moment, but the real focus should be whether or not you have what it takes to remain afloat.”

Don’t be afraid of the tick tocking of any clock. Granted, we are not all allotted the same amount of time on this earth but while we are here the best way to show how much we are grateful for this time is by enjoying it now. Go in the direction of where your heart is pulling you and work for whatever it is that you are passionate about. If you haven’t quite found that passion yet, check out your hobbies and what genuinely excites you. Eventually you will find something that will help to fulfill you.

Regardless of what you choose to go for in life, remember that instant success is bland just like instant rice. You want your success to have some spices in it, a good sturdy pot to hold it, and a good amount of time coupled with the right amount of heat to cook it right to perfection. Yum, now that’s what I call a meal!

Today’s Takeout (formerly *takeaway)

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  1. True success tastes better when cooked for a while.

  2. Popcorn also tastes better when cooked  for a while.

  3. Validation is even more valid when sought from within.

  4. It is more important to focus on longevity when it comes to success as opposed to focusing on instant and possibly fleeting moments of success. 

 

 

If you enjoyed this read or want to add to the conversation please do NOT hesitate to comment below. Make sure to share this with friends, family coworkers, associates, exes, besties, and anyone else who may need a word of encouragement. Until next time splendid readers!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Serenity, Smiles & Positive Vibes,

 

 

 

 

 

Ms. Royale

 

 

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Inspirational Quotes, lifestyle blogger, Motivation

Live Your Best Life RIGHT Now!

Throughout this past year I’ve been on a self discovery like no other. I’ve learned to appreciate and see value in parts of my life I had once never seen. I’ve learned the true power of positive thinking and activated the law of attraction into my life. There’s so much more I could dish out to you about my improved mindset but I want this to be about you, splendid reader.

If you can allow yourself to get caught up in some of the atrocities of this world it will hinder you from a lot which is why learning how to focus more on the positivity that exists is so important. Of course there are times when we need to address issues for what they are but don’t forget to embrace the blessings, big and small.

Just last month I visited Mexico and as mentioned in my last Focus Friday Post I lost my wallet. Unfortunately I went crazy for about two days straight thinking it was left at the airport there but the following Sunday night I received an email from the airline that it was actually found at the airport back here in the states.

You see, when I focused all of my energy on the issue in that moment it wasn’t at all helpful. I did what it is that I needed to do which was follow proper protocols such as filing a report and such. However, even after doing all that I still felt the need to panic as if that would make it all better. Well, it didn’t but you knew that splendid reader because you are super smart (hence how you stumbled upon this blog and this post).

I want to keep this short and sweet for you so I need you to pay close attention here. Our energy in life is extremely sacred and it is up to each individual to be safe keepers of their own energy. When we allow ourselves to exert so much energy and devote copious amounts of time in the direction of what we don’t want, then we are preventing good things from coming our way. For some folks this idea is called “blocking your blessings,” or for others they say “you are getting in your own way.”

“Our energy in life is extremely sacred and it is up to each individual to be safe keepers of their own energy.”

With all that said, I realized that in the moment that my wallet went missing I immediately blocked the blessing of its return to me. I panicked, freaked out cried, and kept calling the airport back in Mexico. I even made a whole list of numbers to call from both airports. I googled the different department numbers and such. Granted, yes it made sense to reach out and make reports. However, when I look back on the way that I went about it, I became obsessive.

By the time Sunday evening came around a few days after I lost my wallet, I had already settled into the idea that finding it was no longer a concern. I came to terms with the fact that after all the wallet and its contents are replaceable. So in my mind I remained hopeful but also realized excessively ruminating on the matter wouldn’t do me any good. Thus, I allowed the universe to bring me whatever it was that I had manifested through previous good deeds and actions towards others. There have been several times throughout college where I found lost student ID’s and I immediately found a way to reach out to these individuals. Then during Mardi Gras this year back in New Orleans a man had dropped his license and I automatically picked up trying to find a way to get it back to him. Thankfully he had already started to walk back towards the area he had lost it. Of course on all of these occasions I was thanked abundantly.

“So in my mind I remained hopeful but also realized excessively ruminating on the matter wouldn’t do me any good.”

While this may sound bizarre to some, I truly do believe the universe and God blessed me enough to find my wallet. Rather than sitting around solely concerned with how life could get better for me, I allowed it to simply get better as a result of what I had already worked for. You see, living your best life isn’t about working yourself to the bone in an effort to make it. Don’t get me wrong, there is work to be done but you need to know when it is time to sit back and receive what life has in store for you.

So now, splendid reader tell me again what is holding you back from living your best or most splendid life? Are you blocking your blessings by thinking too much about how to get those blessings in the first place? Are you focused on the wrong things or consumed in negativity?

“You see, living your best life isn’t about working yourself to the bone in an effort to make it.”

If you are consumed in negativity, it is important for you to think of ways to remove yourself from that space. One of the ways I did so was by taking a social media hiatus from specific sites that usually put me in a troubled mindset. One of the ways I’ve allowed blessings to flow straight to me is by doing the work and moving on. Once you’ve done what you need to do for a situation it is okay to move on (i.e. my wallet story). In essence, as cliche as it is, I have been the sole blessing blocker of myself by focusing my energy in places that it didn’t need to be.

Nevertheless, in order for you to live your best life you’ve got to put yourself into that mindset first. Being consumed in negativity, being caught up with people who hold you back or in circumstances that stunt your growth is not the way to live your best life.

Today’s Takeaway

  1. Our energy is too sacred to continuously focus on what is troubling us, so focus your energy more on what you want versus what you don’t want.

  2. Do the work and move forward which will allow the blessings to flow your way.

  3. Remove yourself from negative situations as much as possible (i.e. people, jobs, social media etc.).

  4. Be prepared for blessings 

Serenity, Smiles, & Positive Vibes,

Ms. Royale

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Inspirational Quotes

Closing the Chapter of Yesterday

‪There are chapters in your life that are begging to be closed, but you are unwilling to do so because you’re afraid you’ll miss that familiarity. In order to move forward or to progress in life you’ve got to do just that, move forward. Remaining stagnant in a position, a place or a relationship that has expired will only confine you to you past.

Besides who wants to live in a time machine of their yesteryears? Of course we may get nostalgic about our lives prior to today but there is so much beauty to take  in today’s moments too. Embrace that! Also, there is even more beauty on its way too in your future. ‬

‪A lot of us complain that we’re hungry for the next chapter but continue flipping back to the old ones.‬ This message might be hitting home for some of you but what I want you to understand is that I am simply reiterating what your soul already knows. Within in us are answers we seek on the outside everyday and those are the same answers God and the universe have already instilled in us. You know what it is that you need to do next so just do it.

So please stop dragging your feet in the mud of yesterday & plant your feet on the concrete of today. Tomorrow’s not here yet so don’t get stuck wallowing in what isn’t yet either. Those chapters that are begging to be closed will not stop teaching you the same old lessons until you finally take that step.

Do it now.

P.S. While this could be used for my Focus Friday post please stay tuned for the official post later today. I just felt this message on my spirit today prior to work and felt compelled to share it. 

Serenity, Smiles, and Positive Vibes,

Ms. Royale 

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Black Blogger, Inspirational Quotes

30 Days of Me Challenge: Day 29- Lessons on Lessons

In the past month, what have you learned

I have learned that my body is way stronger than I sometimes believe it to be.

I already have the tools necessary to design my future.

There is literally nothing you can’t achieve if your heart, mind and soul are in the right place while being on one accord.

Your body is the vessel given to you by God to navigate through this journey called life so one of the most important jobs you have is to treat it well with daily upkeep from the foods you consume and the energy you allow to remain around you.

Overall, that is what I have learned within this last month. As we move closer to the year’s end I am even more motivated to continue with my path of self love and discovery. Here’s to more lessons on lessons, and blessings on blessings. I am ready to grow into destiny. In the words of Kelly from Insecure

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Black Blogger, Black Girl Magic, black women, Inspirational Quotes, Self-Care

30 Days of Me Challenge: Day 28- That was Then, This is Now

Today’s Topic: A picture from you last year and now, how have you changed?

The picture on the left is from my time living in Atlanta for the summer & the one on the right is from a few weeks ago. I can’t even begin to explain how much I have changed since then. I will try to keep it simple…y’all know I struggle with that. But physically I cut my hair right after graduation and before moving to the south. This year I allowed my hair to grow back and have moved back up north.

Last year I was still recovering from some personal pain and couldn’t seem to get over certain things. This year I am way more in tune with my spirit and what it needs. I am no longer harboring hard feelings towards past hurt or from those who may have inflicted that hurt upon me. I’ve also gone from wanting to consume all types of food with the mentality of “We’re gonna die one day anyways,” to now thinking “I must eat to live NOT live to eat.

This year I honestly love myself a whole lot more.

 

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Black Blogger, Inspirational Quotes, Motivation

30 Days of Me Challenge: Day 27- The Reason

Today’s Topic: Why are you doing this 30 day challenge?

I’ve probably mentioned this in prior posts but I started this challenge to build my consistency within my blog. When I first began taking my blog more serious I built a schedule around it with several topics for each week. However, I quickly realized that I was doing the absolute most. After attending a bloggers conference back in August I also realized something, I am way too eccentric to have my blog centered on one thing. One of the sessions I attended heavily focused on this idea of a “nicheless blog,” so I took that idea and have been thinking about it for a while now. I used this challenge as a way to see how it feels to navigate from topic to topic on a daily basis without one set idea or theme. I just wanted to see how it would feel and as aforementioned remain consistent. Although I did skip a few days and then backdate the posts later, I still made sure to hit every topic. So thanks to this challenge I’ve broke the status quo of my blog just being an inspirational blog, it’s nicheless but the underlying theme will always be to inspire others in some way.

 

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Black Blogger, Inspirational Quotes

30 Days of Me Challenge: Day 18

Today’s topic is “plans/dreams/goals,” that I have. People who know me personally also know that I can go on for days, hell even months explaining my dreams. However, I am learning to be more concise in life. With that said, I’ll keep it short and super sweet.

One short term goal that I currently have is to remain committed to my newfound plant-based diet aka being vegan. I started back in July and have honestly done an amazing job thus far. The only thing that I miss about life pre-veganism is eggs and cheese which I will admit I have snuck a few times. I’m doing way better as of recently though.

Another short term goal is to remain committed for the next 21 days to a fitness class I recently signed up for. Today was my first day and let me tell y’all that workout kicked my ass. But, I think I did damn good for the first day.

In terms of plans and dreams, I plan on starting my GRE prep again in order to follow my dreams of starting grad school next fall. I’m tired of holding myself back but I am also appreciate of the time that I’ve given myself to really think about what it is that I want in life. Another dream I have is to have a writing job before the end of this year, it can be remote or in person but no matter what I want to work in the field that I am passionate about sooner rather than later.

See, that was short and sweet right? Alrighty, now that that’s out of the way, what are some of your plans, dreams or goals? Have you started any of them yet? If not, what are you waiting for? Let’s gooo!!! Dreams aren’t meant to simply be seen during sleep, they deserve to see the light of day. 


Featured image source 

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Inspirational Quotes, Quotes, Self-Care

23 Daily Affirmations for Your 20-Somethings

So as the world continues to turn and we all are reminded that we seriously have one life to live (did y’all get the soap opera references? no?…okay nevermind lol) Anyways, in all seriousness it is appearing that more and more of us 20 something year olds are really out here lost in the sauce. This feeling of being lost doesn’t only apply to folks in their 20s, but it extends to those in their 30s, 40s and up. I know it sounds weird but it’s true. As kids we assume that once we’re older everything will magically get better and we will know everything BUT obviously we now know that this fantasy is far from the truth.

Now, before we get into the meat and bones of this post, let’s quickly discuss what an affirmation is anyways. It’s a more common phrase today throughout social media, blogs, and such. The term Daily Affirmation is largely related to the theory known as the “Law of Attraction.” Being someone who grew up in a Christian household, I honestly connect what I learned growing up to the Law of Attraction. It’s a simple idea honestly. Simply put, what we speak,  say and think are all in direct relation to what it is that we receive in life. Throughout my life I’ve heard several sermons in relation to the idea that, “There is power in the tongue.” As for the Law of Attraction or Manifestation, “What you speak is what you will see or manifest.”

 

More specifically, a Daily Affirmation is a statement we make to ourselves that we affirm as being true or as one definition says it is “Law. a solemn declaration…” For example, when we declare to ourselves that we are “powerful beyond belief ” or that “we can and will accomplish something,” we are affirming the greatness that exists within ourselves. This is why it is important to implement Daily Affirmations into our everyday routines. The more you think that something is true, then the easier it is to speak it as if it is true and later act as if it is true. Therefore, if you have affirmed that you deserve greatness in your life then you will say and do things that reflect that belief. As a result you will begin to attract that desired greatness in different areas of your life

Implementing Daily Affirmations is literally so simple that you can do it while washing your face or brushing your teeth in the morning. For those who read last week’s Focus Friday post, you’ll recall the picture of Gabrielle Union in the hit show “Being Mary Jane,” where she has a whole bunch of sticky notes on her bathroom mirror. Each sticky note had an affirmation on it so that each day she is reminded of the positive thoughts she has about herself. It’s that simple y’all!

With that said, I wanted to give us all a pick me up for the week. In the usual nature of Focus Fridays, let’s focus on some positivity to kick off our weekend. I present you with 23 daily affirmations for all you 20 something year olds. (Ohh and don’t worry if you’re not in your 20’s, trust me these might still apply to you.)

  1. I don’t have to have ALL my shit together today or right now.

  2. It is okay to let go of the friendships, relationships, and even jobs that I’ve outgrown.

  3. I have a whole lot of life left to live it up.

  4. I have ALL the tools to succeed already within myself.

  5. There is nothing wrong with leaning on others for support.

  6. I deserve to be happy and to have peace of mind.

  7. Love can wait and so can I.

  8. Desiring love and pursuing it doesn’t make me “thirsty,” or desperate.

  9. I will refrain from going out of my way for people who can’t see my worth.

  10. I will make self-care a major part of my life.

  11. I am deserving of a comfortable & rewarding career.

  12. There is nothing wrong with asking for what I’ve earned and deserve.

  13. I am allowed to take up space & exist no matter what.

  14. I can and I will push myself everyday to fulfill my own happiness even in the smallest ways.

  15. I do not need anyone to complete me, I am already the whole package.

  16. I am my only competition and I am winning on both sides.

  17. I will not allow others to define my worth.

  18. I will enjoy the days of my youth as much as possible.

  19. I don’t need to have what everyone else has, what’s for me is just for me.

  20. I am still learning, I am still growing and that is okay.

  21. I am more powerful than I think and I will live a life full of splendor.

  22. I am am worthy of respect from myself and from others.

  23. I love every scar, curve, blemish or stretch mark that makes up my body. My mind, body and spirit is splendid!

 

P.S. I hope that this inspires someone to continue living their life in sweet, sweet splendor! Let me know in the comments which affirmation is your favorite & which one you’ll be posting on your bathroom mirror first. Make sure to share this list with others who you know will benefit from it.

 

Serenity, Smiles & Positive Vibes,

 

 

 

Ms. Royale

 

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Black Blogger, Creative Writing, Inspirational Quotes, Self-Care

Focus Friday: 23 Ways To Embrace Your Splendor

Our society is inundated with this blaring message that in order to find love you must first love yourself. While there isn’t anything inherently wrong with this message, my issue is with the fact that the journey of self-love is often tied with trying to find your “true love.” Why can’t we simply learn to love ourselves for the benefit of ourselves?

It’s key to love yourself not just so that someone else will love you, but also so that you can live a much more comfortable and liberating life. How can you go on living a productive and fulfilling life if you have yet to accept yourself fully? I’ll admit that self-love is a process, so do not be afraid to start that journey (if you haven’t already) because most of us will be on this journey for quite some time. But if you’re one of those people who have already embarked on this path to self-acceptance, and self-love then you are on the right page already.

So check out my 23, yes 23, Ways to Embrace Your Splendor.

  1. Daily Affirmations
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Gabrielle Union as Mary Jane in the Series “Being Mary Jane.” (Source)

These are honestly some of the best things to apply to your daily life. Think of a daily affirmation as your life’s mantra. Think of 3 positive keywords you want to be reflected in your life and state them daily in the mirror to yourself.

For example, “I am powerful, phenomenal and precious.” You can even go as far to say something along the lines of “I am a treasure and should be treated with the utmost respect.” For those of us who saw Girls Trip, we can link this back to the Regina Hall’s character Ryan who was constantly found repeating a self-affirmation in her time of distress.

Regina Hall as Ryan in the movie Girls Trip. Her Daily Affirmation was: “I am strong. I am powerful. I am beautiful.”

Although I’ve never really watched much of it but to those of you who are Being Mary Jane fans, I’m sure you all are familiar with her season 1 post its all over her mirror. If you practice this daily affirmation exercise, I can reassure you that it will help to boost your mood for the day. It’s especially helpful when you repeat and mediate on these words in the morning before going about your day.

  1. STOP comparing yourself to others

This is probably the worst thing one can do, especially in today’s society. Nowadays we are inundated with pictures, updates and such of others that we barely have time to look at ourselves. While that guy or gal might have what appears to be what you want, you do not know what they went through in order to get that desire. Your journey can only be compared to one person and that is…YOU.

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Sister Naomi Letting You Know What Time It Is (Source)

  1. Write
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You Don’t Need to Write An Essay… (Source)

I cannot stress this enough. Writing has gotten me through some of the worse times in my life. You don’t have to be an Alice Walker, Toni Morrison, or Edwidge Danticat. Just get yourself a nice little notebook or hell a sheet of receipt paper (I did this at an old dining hall job I had). But whatever it is, just write how you’re feeling at the moment. Express yourself. Even if you just open up the notes app in your handy dandy device, just type a few words throughout the day to check in with yourself. Hell, it can be as simple as “You good sis?” Yes I call myself “sis,” sometimes. Don’t judge!

Nor do you have to type like this….

  1. Be Real With Yourself
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Just Be Real With Yourself (Source)

If you know that you cannot do a certain thing for whatever reason, don’t try to pressure yourself. Always push but don’t pressure. Be happy with you are at the moment and understand the importance of being transparent with yourself.

  1. Play Dress Up!
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Strut Yo Stuff Laverne! (Source)

Sometimes we just need a day where we slap on some lip gloss or even chap-stick. Do up our hair, put our nicest pair of clothes on and strut our stuff.

  1. Take a Media Break

This goes back to #2, we’re so used to scrolling, clicking and liking to the point where we set up certain standards for ourselves. These standards are often subconsciously developed from what we see on TV but nowadays it’s especially from social media. But guess what? You can control what you see on your newsfeed. Unlike the days when we were growing up with just TV as our main source of media, we can control what appears in our feed based off of who we follow. Regardless, there might be people we follow who seem to be doing better than us which can cause our insecurities to surface while taking a daily scroll. Don’t believe the hype!

  1. Strengthen Your Body
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Don’t End Up Like Mr. Potato Head 😦 (Source)

Sometimes the best way to be more comfortable with yourself is to tone up. While this doesn’t mean to develop a rigorous workout plan, some of us, myself included, needs this in their life. Set goals for exercise that caters to your specific body type, and your mind as well. This can be done by reading more, paying brain games and of course making physical activity a part of your daily life.

  1. Remember Your Story
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Even the Queen of the World Embraces Her Story, Good or Bad (Source)

We all have different reasons as of to how we got to where we are today. Remember the beauty in your past and the ugliness too. Those two factors are what have guided you to the life you are living now. Your story is unique and beautiful just like you are. You have just as much power to positively impact the world as the next person. You just being you is enough already.

  1. Switch Up Your style

This is not to sound superficial but if you want to love the skin you’re in more, then take more time to groom yourself. Now grooming can be different for various people. So don’t think it only means throwing makeup on or wearing the latest trends. Add a little bit more flavor to your usual style. Make it your own. Whatever it is, sis make it pop.

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Switch Your Style, BUT Don’t Steal or Bite From Others (Source)

  1. Accentuate YOUR favorite features

We all have at least one thing about our bodies or our personalities that we love. If you can’t think of it immediately, think about it for a little then jot some thoughts down. Whatever that thing is for you, find it, embrace it and accentuate it. It could be your smile, your legs or your humor. Take that splendid feature of yours and rock it like nobody’s business.

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Embrace Dat Ass Sis…even if it don’t exist 😥 (Source)

  1. Buy Yourself Something Nice

I cannot stress this enough. I understand that everyone’s financial situations are different but there is a helping hand in the app world called Groupon. During my short time as a teacher I used up Groupon to visit nearly every massage parlor, spa or nail salon in New Orleans. If you’ve never had a massage, trust me you are missing out on sweet, sweet splendor. So as my bestie Sam and I often say to each other “Treat yo self!” aka our favorite Parks & Rec line of all time.

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#ForeverMood (Source)

  1. Appreciate Your Differences

Perhaps you feel as if you are an anomaly of some sort or that you’ve never fit in (that’s me). Learn to embrace those differences. We must remember that no one in the world is built like us and therefore we all bring something splendid to the table. Your differences just might be the inspiration someone similar to you needs to see in order to build more confidence within their self.

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Twirl On Them Haters & Embrace Yourself! (Source)

  1. Stop Judging Yourself

Listen here sis, there are far too many struggles in this cold world to worry about. Judging yourself should not be one of those struggles. Let that judgmental mentality go and allow yourself to enjoy life while you can.

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I Know That’s Right Queen Latrice! (Source)

  1. Respect Your Body
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Sometimes You Just Gotta Hit That Body Roll Like Queen Serena (Source)

A lot of us treat our bodies like dumpsters. We dump all types of trashy foods into it as if it doesn’t take us from point A to B every day. Our bodies treat us so well but they’ll treat us even better the better we take care of it from inside to out. My advice would be to fuel it with the proper nutrients, surround it with the right energy and burn the right amount of energy  off too. Don’t just allow anyone to occupy your space, time or your body.

  1. Find What Makes YOU Happy

If that means binge watching hours of old episodes of Spongebob or Living Single while scarfing down some (healthy) snacks or going for a run. Find something that brings you joy in the day and specifically make it a part of your daily routine.

  1. Take Yourself Out
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Me too Craig…me too (Source)

This is another thing I’ve grown to love this year. Some call it masterDating and I love it. I’ve gone to concerts, dinners, and the movies all on my own. In fact, I sometimes prefer that because then there are no expectations that I have for others. I know myself best so I know that being in my company won’t let me down. Going out on your own can seem a bit scary at first but trust after the third time you’ll be a pro. Yes to masterDates! During your moments of solitude, you also get a chance to truly learn what it is that you love.

  1. Watch daily Motivational Videos
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Speak It Into Existence (Source)

I am a motivational video junky. Literally if you go through my YouTube video history or watch later list, all you’ll see is in relation to personal development or regarding living your best life. Trust me it helps. If you watch one everyday for at least 5 minutes before starting your day it can give your soul a nice boost of energy. It’s like an espresso shot for your mind and spirit. Some of my favorites to watch are Les Brown, Lisa Nichols and Ralph Smart (Infinite Waters).

  1. Sip a Splendid Drink
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How Else Do You Live Forever? Duh! Drink that Red Wine! (Source)

Wine? Daiquiri? Smoothies? Or a simple sweet tea on the rocks? Choose your flavor and sip your beverage in peace. If you aren’t already up on the smoothie wave, I urge you to get on it. I have one at least 3-5x a week. But, this is about YOU. Find your favorite drink, blast some music and sip that tea, wine, or smoothie.

  1. Treat Your Body
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You Know What Time It Is (Source)

You don’t even need a spa for spa treatment. YouTube and Pinterest are stock full of DIY spa ideas for your home. So if you’re an introvert like me you don’t even got to leave the comfort of your own humble abode. You can even hit up your local pharmacy for some mini facial packets. I’ve used a few that are so relaxing and rejuvenating for my skin. Another way to treat your body is to cook yourself a good meal…or order one. But, if you are not a big cooker, trust me it can be relaxing once you get the hang of it. Not everyone is the kitchen friendly type and I understand.

  1. Laugh More
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Find some friends to laugh with like this guy! (Source)

Did you know it takes more energy and muscles to frown than to smile? I would insert a link with stats about this little fun fact but I’m too tired to do so at the moment. So google it. Anyways, there is so much to smile about in this world and to laugh about. Yet we tend to get some caught up in the circumstances that make us cry so much more than those that can bring us tears of joy. I tend to laugh a lot because I make silly jokes to get myself through the day. You can find standup specials everywhere or if that’s not your wave watch Teletubbies (I promise you won’t stop laughing).

  1. Take a Damn Nap

Enough said. Sleep. That is all.

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I Feel You Sis! (Source)

  1. …Just Breathe

There’s a song I would hear on the radio as a kid that has always been a favorite. Basically there are times when all we need to just do is breathe. Part of embracing the skin your in is accepting your life for what it is. Now if you are trying to get to the next level you should being making strides towards that. However, it is okay to just breathe and take a break. Give yourself a break when it is necessary.

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Okay maybe not like this but you get the point…(Source)

  1. Drink Water

Look, I ain’t bout to play with you sis. Drink your damn water and go! People out here having all these different conditions and come to find out some of y’all just parched. Quench your thirst, love yourself and moisturize.

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DRINK UP SIS! Moisturize Your Insides LOL (Source)

 

 

 

Serenity, Smiles & Positive Vibes,

 

 

 

Ms. Royale

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